“People can’t really be put into boxes,” she says. “We need to get away from just category, and we have to allow people who were in one to move into the next category, [to] respect their right to self-determine.”
-Janet Mock
Trans* activist, Janet Mock
I am busy with my adventure of the week, but need to share this article, called “My Womanhood Is Valid,” with you. It resonated with me on the level of recognizing why I feel uncomfortable in certain moments. The majority of the moments where I’ve felt unsafe have been the moments where I did not feel able to determine who I wanted to be, or did not feel able to be who I am. I’m not trans* but I have a lot of trans* role models, as I often hear from them the language of assertiveness, and an outward expression of one’s true self.
Hihihi Beautiful People! How was your week? And so it is Friday in which I share with you a curated list of links culled from the internets, sometimes to educate, sometimes to entertain, but mostly to cheer the weekdays out with a bang. Enjoyyyyyy!
If you want to succeed, you can’t wait for the world to give you attention the way a cripple waits for food stamps to arrive in the mail. You have to be a warrior. You have to attack with the madness of a mother whose child is surrounded by an army of predators.
Because, let’s face it, your ideas are your children. Their future is as tender and delicate as that of any newborn.
I love the concept of the blog Reclaiming Delphi so, so, so much! To clarify, Gaia is one of the primordial deities of Ancient Greece, and her place of worship was taken over by the male god Apollo. Apollo gave high priestesses on Gaia’s worship ground the power to make prophecies and generally advise kings from all around. Instead of strengthening a connection to Gaia however, the people switched over to worshipping Apollo. Boo!
If you’re an aspiring fashion designer, or just plain hardcore about your love of textiles and collar styles, the Fashionary notebook might be for you.
For all you lovers of beautiful kitchens, The Yvestown Blog takes the cake.
Strange but smart: The Rack Trap essentially turns your bra into a pocket. This would be really good for going clubbing, or keeping your keys when you go for a run.
Ok, get your mind out of the gutter for a second. Not Martha’s surprise balls look like such a fun party favour to make. Time consuming, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?
Macarons are beautiful and gorgeous and lovely. Especially these matcha ones, with white chocolate in the middle. And because you obviously want to know how to make them now, even though pastry chefs train for years to get it right, here’s a seemingly easy to follow recipe.
The 6 Keys to Being Awesome At Everything doesn’t actually tell you anything you didn’t already know, except for one novel idea: ritualize practise. Says the article author:
The best way to insure you’ll take on difficult tasks is to ritualize them — build specific, inviolable times at which you do them, so that over time you do them without having to squander energy thinking about them.
Ahahaha! I’m icing cakes with 30 chicks and you fuckwits are showering together! You. MUST. watch. this!!
Just let you son be, don’t push him one way or another. That’s your kid, period….you’ve just got to love and support them, as rough as it can be in the world…home has to be stable.
I wanna be this chick. I wanna bring home the bacon and fry it up in the pan. Oh wait a minute. I ALREADY DO! Holla! Thanks 1908′s, for trailblazing for me.
Um…did he just play a trance song on his guitar? Dear lord, this is genius!
Sebastien Wiernick is a furniture designer, although I feel as though calling him a mere furniture designer doesn’t fully capture the scale of his work.
Raw on $10 a Day. I just discovered this blog. I think it’s absolutely perfect for students who want to eat healthy on a budget.
I don’t drink anymore, but if I still did, I would be ALL OVER these. It’s pre-measured wine in a portable shatter-proof wine glass! How perfect is that for summer picnics man?
Gaycabulary Lesson. Hahaha! Winning the Gay Lottery has been a dream for ages. My image of the perfect girlfriend is essentially a hybrid Barbie+Vibrator+Housekeeper with a pink convertible BMW in tow. Truth.
Also from Unicorns for Socialism, 100 Alternatives to “So Waddaya Do“? I’m crushing on Alexandra Franzen like mad right now ya’ll- subscribe to her blog!
The next time one of my friends gets back with a horrible ex I will send them this article: On “Feeling Bad” And Why That’s A Cycle of Bullshit You Need To Stop Immediately, Part 1 and Part 2. No matter how good the sex, by breakup #4, you know you’re wrong for each other.
Twitter’s promo video is a SO cool! I had no idea that some of these people were even on Twitter. Did you know that there’s an astronaut in space right now who tweets pics of the earth every day as they pass over major landmarks?!
“Why did you kiss me?!”
“Because I like you.”
“Oh. I’m going to kiss you back because I like you too!”
Ooooo! So close to the end of Friday. I spent all day working without even realising it! So, as is custom, here are 10 things from around the internets that I’m loving right now.
Tom Ford for interview magazine. I’ve called Tom Ford “Papa” since age 14. He’s the white, tall, gay male version of the charming gentlewoman that I am in my head.
Joel Johnson’s “Why I’m Funny” is extremely difficult to read because of the honesty with which he tells the story of his childhood sexual abuse. And that’s exactly why you should read it.
Hey, did you know that there’s actually a magazine called The Gentlewoman? Someone get me a subscription, stat!
The Energy Project is a really cool collective that aims to energize people. Their article, Take Back Control of Your Work (and Your Life) isn’t anything you didn’t already know, but it’s worded quite well and worth taking to heart.
Tips for young writers is written for high school and elementary kids, but I think it’s also useful for the older set, especially if you’re super highly creative, for a back-to-basics approach to generating ideas and getting them out there.
5) An extensive and intensive guide to e-commerce copywriting, essential reading to all aspiring internet entrepreneurs, bloggers with e-books, business writers, and anyone and everyone who might be or currently is working in the business of selling stuff via the internets.
Happy Friday. What are you going to be up to this weekend?
I’m working on an essay about Aristotle, virtue ethics and modern female self-confidence. I’m super excited about it. I stayed up till 2am working on it last night, while all my friends were out partying on St. Patrick’s day. Yeah, I stayed sober on St. Patty’s day to write an essay about ancient Greek philosophy. For fun. I also have a book review that I’m working on for you guys as well. It’s about this book. I won’t say too much more about it though, cause I’ll talk more about it in the review. Nerds of the world, unite!
So, to ease into the weekend, and give a virtual shout out to all the other awesomeness going on out there in the Interwebs, I present you with this week’s Link Love! May you catch the brass ring.
Havi Brooks’ “Recoding Your Mind” guided meditation is my slice of calm in a flurry of chaos. She guides you through giving yourself permission to change words in your brain that are holding you back, like turning worry into serenity. I downloaded a copy of it onto my Blackberry so I could carry inner peace around the world with me. Thanks Havi!
I’ve probs already shared this with you, but Paul Graham’s 2008 descriptive essay, “Lies We Tell Kids” bares sharing yet again.
Out.com’s 2010 Top 40 Under 40 introduced me to a lot of incredible queer activists/individuals that I didn’t even realise were doing such great work. It also makes me want to double my output and stop sleeping. At least until age forty.
Daily Grommet is your source for the newest and coolest and most innovative in like, everything. I don’t usually like to give serious endorsements to companies that are peddling to a sense of lack, but the products featured on Daily Grommet are genuine in their usefulness. Like the Alex water bottle. Dear Alex, I have a crush on you.
Dangerous Liaisons. An article from The Advocate about homophobia in Africa. It hit a little close to home for me, but appropriately so. Thanks Jeff Sharlet!
Andrej Pejic. Stunning. Androgynous. Probs NSFW, as he bares his ass for Vogue. But still stunning. Thanks for being you, Andrej!
You can read the whole thing, but the 3 Success Secrets That People Don’t Talk About Enough are: 1) connect with people you find interesting, 2) make another person successful and 3) make friends not business contacts. V, v, true. Thanks Srinivas!
I don’t read Jak & Jil, the streetstyle blog very often, but I adore this, this and these images.
My friend Benjamin Bach interviewed Gary Vaynerchuck about his latest book, The Thank You Economy. I’ve always found Gary Vee to be really obnoxious, even though I follow him on Twitter. The interview surprised me in the end though, because of the response Gary gave after Ben asked him if he’d prefer if people bought the hardcopy, to try to get it on the New York Times list, or if he’d prefer if people bought the Amazon e-book.
“The best place to get it is the libarary, where you don’t have to pay for it but can still get the content.” I underestimated his commitment to getting his message out there. Often, the desire for numbers and dollars dilutes the original goal, doesn’t it? I’m glad he surprised me.
The Disappointing Gay Best Friend series on Vimeo crack me up errtime. Here it is in its entirety for you. Damn you gay best friend, why won’t you fulfil all my preconceived notions!
My weekly salute to things that edumacate and entertain. Enjoyizzle!
Do you know the difference between a strategy and a tactic? No, really, do you? Because learning the meaning of those two words has actually helped me rethink how I’m going about achieving my goals, and I’m really excited about it! Thanks BrandInsightBlog!
I just discovered a small company from Omaha, Nebraska called Princess Laserton. Um, hello coolest company name ever! Princesslasertron.com Her webdesign is also smashing. It’s feminine and whimsy, without being cheesy or playing too much into stereotypes about what it means to be girly/a bride. Expertly executed design makes me so happy. I don’t use composition notebooks for anything, but if I did, I would get her “love” notebook cover.
Everybody say “Thank you Tania,” for finding and sharing this video. For years, I’ve been suffering from wind deficiency, stomach punch, swallowed my food after chewing it, and now that I’ve started taking Retaphin, I’ve become 75% more of a pet owner. Thanks Retaphin!
This interview was way back when Diddy was still P.Diddy, circa a long time ago. Diddy is a big role model to me, because of his tenacity and his dogged perseverance and entrepreneurial spirit. At 13 years old, he negotiated a series of deals with paper boys all over Westchester county and was making $600 dollars a week off of selling their routes. Less than a decade later, he was directing artist development at the first record company he ever worked for. Swoon.
This is the best and funniest Disney spoof you’ll ever see. It’s the Mean Girls trailer reenacted by Belle, Jasmine, Snow White, Cinderella and Ariel.
This girl knows where it’s at when it comes to putting haters in their place.
I’m a sucker for a boy who can dance, and this one’s got swagga for days!
Moment of Silence: I’d like to dedicate a moment of silence to Gabrielle Giffords, a United States member of Congress (Democrat) as well as a supported of renewable energy and embryonic stem cell research who was shot point blank on January 8th.
FuckYeahCuteTransChicks. I recently made friends with a MTF (that’s male to female) transgender individual, who’s got a bit too much of a righteous temper for me to feel comfortable asking all I want to ask. Luckily, I’ve since made another trans friend, FTM (female to male) who helped me sort out a few of the buzzing questions. Still, before we met, I stumbled across FuckYeahCuteTransChicks and there are few things I love more than celebrations of beauty.
The number one best selling non-fiction book the day I was born was called “Me: Stories of My Life“. I feel like the Universe gets off on affirming my narcissism.
Why are unnatural hair colours just so, SO sexy? Proof positive:
I’m going to grow out my hair and get myself a bright blue afro with hot pink tips and curl it into big bouncy waves every morning. It’ll be so hot and so high maintenance, just the way I like it. (Images in order: ugg_off; coco_chanelle; Rachel Stratton
Neuroticpoets.com Um, what? Where has this site been all my life! I made a resolution to re-acquaint myself with poetry this year and Sylvia Plath is at the top of my list.
It’s a year old, but it’s still relevant, heart breaking and stunning. Rachel Colemann uses her once broken marriage (their marriage was at the point where “I love you,” was received with suspicion) and her two special needs children to spin a persuasive tale about shunning the passive mode in your life. Her blog in general is incredible too. This post brought tears to my eyes. I haven’t cried for another person since I was 13 years old. Not out of insensitivity, but because I find it unhelpful to do so. It felt helpful to cry tears of joy in this case. Read it, and send good vibes her way.
Bitch slap in slow motion. I watched it four times in a row.
Water balloon in the face in slow motion. Not as much fun to say as “bitch slap in slow motion” but still visually appealing.
How was your working week you guys? I just wrapped up my first week of school since April 2010. The best part of the week: my #Phil215 course has it’s own twitter hashtag! The worst part? I’d completely forgotten just how much mental energy academics requires of me. I’ve gotten a full night’s sleep every night this week, and I still wake up tired. Boo!
Favourite from The 99% this week: Getting Creative Things Done: How to Fit Hard Thinking Into a Busy Schedule. I probably shouldn’t talk about this so publicly to save myself from embarrassment in case we ever meet but…I have a huge, huge, intellectual crush on Scott Belsky. (He’s the mastermind behind Behance, the company that produces The 99% and many other wonderful things.)
I am big on extrinsic motivation. It’s what gets me going in the morning other than coffee and this article from genius Cal Newport has finally uncovered the ins and outs of using extrinsic motivation to get you going. The trick?
your reasons for the task match your deeply-held values; and
your approach to the task is self-determined, not something someone imposed on you.
I love my American Apparel sweater, but I love social justice even more. I’m done with supporting a racist, misogynistic company. I highly suggest getting edumaformed on why I’m spewing vitriol in the AA direction.
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2) I am retroactively adding ALT text to all the images on my blog. I appreciate your patience while I work on this.
3) I am still a new hatchling to the formal discussions around equality activism, though I am learning more and more each day. Ergo, I make a lot of mistakes without even realising them as such and am open and welcome to learning and teaching within the community. If you spot discrimination, ignorance, minimisation or prejudice in something I've written, you are encouraged to leave a respectful response to the post pointing it out and suggesting how it could be corrected. My blog ain't a public square, but constructive discussions are always welcome!
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If you think you might be LGBTQ and you're not in a place that's embracing you for who you are please note: you are not alone, you are cared for, and you do not have to suffer in silence. Also, your bullies poo poo heads, do not listen to them. :)
